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A Modern Geek Book Review

Transmitted on Wednesday, February, 16th, 2011 in The Modern Geek

A Modern Geek Book Review:

“Weapon X”…The Best Ever!

From time to time, Modern Geek will take time out to spotlight outstanding achievements and/or pivotal moments in Geek. Today is one of those times.

First and foremost, I’m a comic book geek…as if this entire website didn’t give it away. And every few months, when my comic book passion has waned on account of lackluster storylines at the local comic book store (I mean, I love you, Marvel, but Jesus!  Nobody fucks up a storyline like you guys!), I undertake that highest of comic book geek pleasures: digging through my entire comic book collection in search of my favorite stories. Dive deeper…

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MG: RAID 0 Turns Me On

Transmitted on Sunday, February, 13th, 2011 in The Modern Geek

Modern Geek Chronicles:

RAID 0 Turns Me On

Yeah.  That’s right.  I said it.

It’s been a long time since I had a serious computer.  Too long.  For about five years now I’ve been living as the Geek equivalent of a Rwandan refugee.  Getting by with one Best Buy, eco-friendly, sans-balls laptop after another.  No real tower of my own to call my base of operations.  All my computers came pre-built.  Quaint little mass produced whores that I, shamefully, let into my house.

I tried not to blame myself.  Times were tough and I couldn’t afford the good stuff.  Yeah, I might snag a decent hard drive here or there.  Maybe throw in some mid-grade ram when I could.  But, ultimately, it was all just the equivalent of dressing up your cousin from West Virginia, taking her to the prom and weeping softly—the both of you—as you made out in the gymnasium bathroom at end of the night.

(Don’t act like that was just me.)

But no more.

This time, like a good geek, I’m building the electronic prom date of my dreams Dive deeper…

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Geek Love

Transmitted on Wednesday, February, 9th, 2011 in The Modern Geek

Geek Love

There’s love, and then there’s Geek Love.

Geek love is the not-so-distant cousin of Love.  Geek Love shows up Love’s family reunion driving an electric car and wearing the most ergonomic shoes his credit chits can buy.  Geek Love settles in at Love’s dinner table next to Long-Distance Love and asks if sexting is working out as well as the algorithms predict.  Geek Love sips its wine and lectures One-Night-Stand-Love about its chances of catching a sexually transmitted disease—yes, Geek Love can be a buzzkill sometimes.  When Intellectual Love walks in Geek Love cheers—they grew up together, Geek Love and Intellectual Love.  They still hang out on the weekends, talking about how sad it was that Firefly was canceled prematurely or discussing the ultimate value of the Existentialist movement.  Sometimes Geek Love sets Intellectual Love up with one of its friends, and vice versa.  But it never quite works out.  It comes close, often, but things never really go the way they probably should.  Why? Dive deeper…

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Geek Defense

Transmitted on Sunday, February, 6th, 2011 in The Modern Geek

Defending Your Fellow Geek

Somewhere north of Columbia  I was low on petrol and vitamin-Twizzler.  As I turned into the gas station it was obvious that things had gone wrong.  A crowd stood around one of the pumps with their hands on their hips or folded across their chests as one of the gas station attendants came from behind the building with a heavy, white bucket-o-something.

The clear liquid spread across the concrete wasn’t water—crowds don’t gather for water anymore.  I won’t keep you in suspense:  it was diesel fuel.  Some schmuck had decided to leave the pump unattended—in spite of the many posted warnings about such things—and now there was so much diesel on the ground I thought Michael Bay was filming Transformers 7:  Another Damned Paycheck.

(For the record:  when standing in the midst of this great quantities of flammable liquid one begins to wonder certain things:  Can cell phones really ignite vapor?  Can a static discharge ignite vapor?      Can a ’98 Honda Accord with a bad paint job and a dented front hood ignite vapor?  Dive deeper…

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